Failure to appreciate. Nothing makes a relationship flourish and thrive like appreciation, and yet in a long term relationship, appreciation tends to fade into the background about as fast as the new car smell on a new lover wears off. One of the most cited reasons for having an affair is not feeling appreciated. When appreciation decreases romance deteriorates and resentment sets in. Resentment is a terminal illness in relationships. If you want to lose a lover, taking them for granted is step number one.
Put that sh!t on autopilot. Most relationships that were once steady can, in fact, run on autopilot with very little actual attention for awhile. However, if you let your relationship with your lover run on autopilot for too long, the relationship will change, and before you know it, you aren’t lovers. You may still be business partners or cohabitating “friends”, but you won’t be lovers like you once were. Energy goes where attention flows, and without attention your relationship will be energy starved and wither up like a flower in a vase without water.
Start using sex as a bargaining chip or even better, a weapon. Sexual connection is a key component that makes two people lovers and not just really good friends. Even friends with benefits are by definition, lovers. When you morph the energy of something that should be tender and precious into something that can be bought and sold, or cause harm, you are cutting off the intimate energy between lovers. Without intimate connection, you’ll be roommates before you know it.
Talk smack about your lover. The spoken word is a massively powerful tool. If you want to leverage deliberate creation to sour your relationship with your lover without burning too many calories, get on the phone with your girlfriend and start sh!t talking your beloved. You’ll get a double or triple dose of negative energy in your bedroom business because your friend’s energy will get in on that party also. It’s like a two for one bullet to the heart of your love life.
Turn your attention and adoration someplace else. You don’t have to get fully messy by literally cheating. It doesn’t have to be a physical act where anyone could accuse you of actually doing something wrong. Simply lust after someone else in your spare time. Daydream about them as often as possible. Route that energy that might go to your actual lover down another stream in another direction. Your lover will start to feel lonely pretty quickly and won’t even know why. It will be our little secret.
Posted on 08/18/2015 at 03:00:00 AM