I Love All of My Pounds and I Don’t Want to Lose Any of Them


When I first met my husband I was a good 25 pounds lighter than I am today. I had a very well-meaning friend who warned me not to lose my dating weight as I settled into togetherness bliss. He called it the bait and switch of the lbs. I think about the warning from time to time and wonder if I should be worried because to be clear I’m not.

Here’s the thing. When I first met my husband, I wasn’t particularly thin. I was nicely middle sized. However, at that perfectly normal middle-weight, I was still asking myself questions about whether or not I might want a breast augmentation. At a barely B cup size, I wished I was a little curvier.

And guess what. Now I am curvier, and I love the soft roundness that sits comfortably on my frame. I especially love my boobs. I love my hips. I love my waist. This curvy, feminine frame suits me just fine.

I love all of my pounds, and even though by a lot of standards I should lose a few, I don’t want to lose any of them.

There I said it.

As I was reading through the promotions section of my inbox this morning there were no fewer than a dozen emails with tantalizing headlines about how effortlessly I could lose some weight. As much as I get that’s a thing, all I could think was “NO THANK YOU” Even if it was effortless, which we know it’s not, I still don’t want to.

However, when I was reading on Facebook this morning that a friend of mine was celebrating losing a pound overnight as she was working her way back to pre-holiday weight, want to know what I thought?

Good for her.

I can celebrate that too. That friend is clearly doing it from a place of giving her body what she wants and following that feel good. That’s a kind of motivation I can get behind.

What I can’t get behind is feeling not good enough until a number on a scale tells me I’m worthy. That’s a fucked up way to feel.

It’s taken me a long time to understand something very important about what it means to have a body and how to take care of it.

Your ideal weight is the weight you are at when:

1.You eat the best foods in healthy proportions

2.You move your body regularly in ways that promote joy, strength, and flexibility

3.You keep a lid on stress

4. You laugh often and smile more than you frown

It’s that simple. By that measurement, I am at my ideal weight. I am no longer willing to go to war with my body for a number on a scale when I’m treating my body with respect and this is where she’s settled.

Besides, I love my curves.

The Dali Lama says happiness is the highest form of health. You can’t measure that on a BMI scale. However, it’s hard to be happy when you’re sick and tired because you’re trashing your body.

It’s as simple as this:

Treat your body like you would a triple crown contending race horse. That race horse is worth millions of dollars, and if you owned it you’d treat it accordingly.

Your body is worth more than that. Treat it accordingly. And then love every one of your pounds, curves, muscles, and all the spaces in between.


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Lisa Hayes, The Love Whisperer, is an LOA Relationship Coach. She helps clients leverage Law of Attraction to get the relationships they dream about and build the lives they want. Lisa is the author of the newly released hit book, Score Your Soulmate and How to Escape from Relationship Hell and The Passion Plan.

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