3 Pro-level (LOA) Communication Strategies to Make Your Relationship Even Stronger

1. Refuse to criticize.

It's so old school to think that you can criticize anyone into being different. Seriously, that shit does not work.

However, criticism is so common in many relationships, it's easy not to notice you're even doing it. You might think you're just pointing out what your partner is doing wrong in an effort to help them get it right, like you're doing them a favor. However, criticism is not a good communication tactic and it's certainly not showing up being helpful. You aren't doing anyone a favor by telling them how wrong they are.

There is a golden ratio in communication. Seven powerfully affirmative statements to one that might be perceived as critical or corrective. If you don't meet that ratio in your communication, I can pretty much assure you, your partner is starting to tune you out. They may not mean to be, but their brain is just going to do it. You're going to start sounding like Charlie Brown's teacher to them. This means if you want any kind of legitimate communication with your partner it has to be vastly and overwhelmingly positive.

People are a lot like puppies. They tend to respond better to positive reinforcement over negative interactions. When you elevate your communication to a criticism-free zone, every aspect of your communication and relationship will shift for the better in a big way.

2. Always talk positively to other people about your partner.

I know women who get together and inevitably before long they are bitching about their partners like it's a competitive sport. While you might think what you're saying about your partner behind their back can't have an impact on how you experience your relationship when you're with them, that thinking is flawed.

Venting, unloading, and processing with the girls about your partner might feel good in the moment, but in the long run, it creates an energy you take home with you when girls night is over. It tends to pick up steam and keep rolling long after you've finished that last glass of wine with your friends. That is not an energy you want flowing into the space you share with someone you love.

Yes, occasionally you might need to talk something through with a friend. However, occasionally is the keyword and when those conversations do happen it needs to be about self-exploration rather than a verbal vomit of random gripes about your beloved.

Energy goes where attention flows. How you talk about your partner creates a focus that will manifest sooner or later because when you say it out loud, you're speaking into existence. However, when you speak it out loud to another person or persons you are amplifying that energy.
You know, where two or more are gathered...

Seeing your partner the way you want them to be is powerful.
Getting other eyes and ears in on a powerful vision of the partner and relationship you want is exponentially even more powerful.

3. Pre-express your appreciation for what you want your partner to be or do.

Appreciation in its typical form is a transactional energy, but that's not where the magic is. Often someone does something for you or something you like and you express your appreciation. It's a little bit or a lot of tit for tat. Like anything transactional, we typically withhold appreciation unless we get something first.

However, appreciation is one of the most powerful forms of energy you can leverage to manifest change, metaphysically and literally. Where criticism shuts people down, gratitude and appreciation open them up wide. Most of us rarely express appreciation to the people we share our lives with enough for what they actually do, let alone being generous with our appreciation when we feel like it's not yet earned.

Pre-appreciation is like putting a gracious and loving spell on the object of it's warmth. It's pure magic. Whatever you want from your partner, start thanking them for being that in advance.

Want a partner who's more romantic? Tell them how much you appreciate how romantic the little things they do for you feel. Thank them for every gesture of kindness and care as if they just handed you a dozen roses on the plane they chartered to take you to dinner in Paris. Tell them one of the things you love about them most is their attention and the very special time you have together, even, or especially if you don't see it yet.

Want a partner who communicates better? Thank them for talking with you about their day. Lavish them sweet appreciation for being so open and present before you're feeling it, so they can feel it.

Want your partner to take out the garbage and start helping with the dishes? Start telling them how grateful you are to have someone in your life who likes to make things easy for you and do it frequently.

People are more likely to move in the direction of where they feel seen in a positive light. So, if you're speaking into existence what you want to experience with your beloved, or anyone else, and then fueling it with pre-appreciation, it would almost take them more effort not to meet you there than it would to show up on the path you've pre-paved for them.

Sharing is sexy. If you liked this article, share, comment, or pass it on.

Lisa Hayes, The Love Whisperer, is an LOA Relationship Coach. She helps clients leverage Law of Attraction to get the relationships they dream about and build the lives they want. Lisa is the author of the newly released hit book, Score Your Soulmate and How to Escape from Relationship Hell and The Passion Plan.