Spiritual Skills to Master That Go Way Beyond "Love and Light"

1. Really see people.

There are a lot of people many just don't see:
Homeless people
People with disabilities
Elderly people
Basically, fill in the blank with any disadvantaged group, and you could be talking about someone that often feels invisible. It's really about seeing the divine in everyone you come in contact with, even when the seeing is difficult.

There is no more powerful way to experience your spiritual nature than to deeply see another and that connection doesn't have to involve and maybe shouldn't involve rescuing, helping, or saving them.

If you want to experience spirituality on a more meaningful level, stop looking away - and stop staring. Make a practice of looking at everyone, especially anyone who is different than you. Study people to find the things you have in common and the things that make them human. Practice relating to the unrelatable as if they remind you of someone you deeply love.

There is no "spirituality" that makes anyone less human than anyone else.
The practice of seeing humanity in everyone is a practice that will change the way you see yourself.


2. Take responsibility for the energy you bring.

Seriously, decide who you want to be and show up being that person regardless of anyone or anything else.

No one can make you feel anything without your permission. So, it's 100% on you to be responsible for the energy you bring all the time.

Simple? Yes.
Easy. Hell no.
But it's doable, and if you're interested in staying in the flow with all that is, owning your own energy is required.

Being responsible for your own energy isn't about putting a smiley face on when you feel like feel like shit.

It's about being honest with yourself about what you're really feeling and then bringing your honest best, not some fake ass shit that smells bad to everyone you come in contact with.

It might be about keeping your bad energy to yourself when you can't show up the way you want to and you know you might be contagious.

A serious, hardcore commitment to taking responsibility for the energy you bring to every situation and every encounter is a game changer. It up-levels your life like a miracle pill - except you know, you actually have to do the work, because there is no miracle pill that does it for you.

3. Stop judging.

And holy mother - that is hard to do - because to judge, in so many ways is human. However, the exercise of suspending judgement creates change in your life that goes far beyond where it started.

When you buckle down and for real refuse to judge, compassion more naturally takes the lead.
When you endeavor to not judge, you miraculously also tend to feel less judged by others yourself.

Judgement gives you an instant burst of feel-good energy in the form of a small shot of adrenaline. However, like all things fueled by adrenaline, eventually, the energy is lost to a sense of exhaustion or malaise because adrenaline is not healthy fuel.

Additionally, judging is an isolating behavior. Any time you judge, you are "othering" and any time you "other" another, you are becoming progressively more alone.

Traditional religion in its many forms is often built on a foundation of judgement. However, spirituality and religion are two different things. Spirituality works best when it's a wide open accepting practice, allowing others to be who they are and reserving all your energy to who you are.

4. Give up needing to be understood or to understand other people.

I'm going to let you in on a little secret. It's almost entirely impossible to ever fully understand another person - and conversely, it's just as difficult for anyone to actually understand you.

Every experience you've had since birth creates your very unique perspective. No one, no matter how close or aligned to you that person is, is ever fully going to get it - and that's ok. In fact, accepting it is a relief.

We have a tendency to place a very high value on feeling understood. However, that's a very tall if not impossible order. What might be a more satisfying desire, would be the feeling of being fully accepted.

When understanding is the measuring stick, acceptance feels conditional.
However, the real powerful place of freedom is acceptance without any conditions.

You're probably not going to find anyone who understands you the way you might crave it. However, if you can find someone who accepts you regardless of who you are, what you feel, or why you think the way you do, you've found a spiritual connection that defies conditional circumstances.
If you can offer that to another, you've set yourself free of needing them to be anything for you to be happy.

This doesn't mean you shouldn't hold sacred boundaries for your relationships. However, it does mean that you love for the sake of loving letting go of the need to be understood or to understand.

Love and understanding should not contingent on each other because if they are, love that lasts is going to be in very short supply.

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Lisa Hayes, The Love Whisperer, is an LOA Relationship Coach. She helps clients leverage Law of Attraction to get the relationships they dream about and build the lives they want. Lisa is the author of the newly released hit book, Score Your Soulmate and How to Escape from Relationship Hell and The Passion Plan.