You Are Not the Lead in Anyone Else's Story

Here’s the deal— They aren't really thinking about you near as much as you think they are. 

Without some really honest introspection, it can get slippery really quickly. Chasing validation AND trying to avoid being disliked like your life depends on it can become a full-time job in the shadows of your brain. That’s your ego nudging you, making you feel like you need to be seen, adored, or recognized to feel worthy.

But here’s a hard truth: people really aren’t thinking about you as much as you think. They’re caught up wrestling with their own insecurities, battling their own struggles, and chasing after their own validation, just like you.

When you rely on their praise, you’re stepping into an illusion. Your ego makes you feel like you’re the center of their universe as if their opinions shape who you are.

But here’s the catch: you’re not the lead in their story. Their fleeting thoughts about you don’t define your reality. In fact, you’re living in a world of your own creation where you imagine the spotlight’s always on you, but truthfully, you’re not even on the stage.

The reality is, most people don’t care nearly as much as you think. Their praise? Sure, it feels good, but in the grand scheme of your soul’s journey, it’s just background noise. Their criticism? It’s nothing more than a passing breeze. Neither has any real power over you—unless you hand it to them on a silver platter.

And yet, we give it away so easily, don’t we? We cling to their praise like it’s a lifeline, letting it mold us into who we think we should be. We run from their criticism, bending ourselves into knots just to avoid rocking the boat, hiding pieces of who we truly are.

But every time you do that, you shrink. You lose the sharp edges of who you are. You turn into a mirror reflecting what you think others want to see, instead of standing strong in your own truth.

Reclaiming Your Power: Disconnect from the Noise

Real freedom comes when you stop caring about what others think. The moment you stop chasing their approval and running from their criticism, you’ll step into the most authentic version of yourself. You become untouchable.

Here’s how to take that power back:

Stop chasing validation. Sure, praise feels great for a moment, but it’s like sugar—sweet but short-lived. The more you chase it, the more it controls you. Remember, your worth isn’t tied to anyone else’s words. You’re not here to collect compliments like gold stars. Let the nice words come and go, but don’t let them shape you.

Detach from criticism. People will always have something to say, and sometimes it won’t be kind. So what? You can’t control their opinions, and honestly, it’s not your job to. The only opinion that truly matters is your own. If you’re living in your truth, their judgments are irrelevant. Their negativity reflects their issues, not yours.

Realize how little they think of you. Not in a harsh way—this is actually freeing. Most people are too wrapped up in their own lives to spend much time thinking about yours. They’re focused on their own worries, their own insecurities. You’re not the center of their universe, and that’s a relief. You can finally stop performing for an audience that isn’t even watching.

Break the comparison cycle. Measuring yourself against others or craving their approval keeps you in a constant state of lack. You’re always looking outside for something that’s already within you. You don’t need their validation because you’ve got your own. Stop comparing your life to theirs—you’re on your own path, and it’s unique.

Cultivate your own validation. Turn inward. The most powerful thing you can do is give yourself the validation you’ve been seeking from others. When you know who you are and live that truth unapologetically, no one else’s opinion can shake you. You become grounded, unshakable. You stop looking for approval outside because you’ve already found it within.

Embrace radical self-acceptance. This is the core of it all. Radical self-acceptance means you stop performing, stop pretending, and stop hiding. You accept yourself—imperfections, quirks, messiness, and all. You’re not here to be perfect. You’re here to be real. And the moment you let go of chasing perfection or anyone else’s approval, that’s when you’ll truly start living.

You don’t need to perform anymore. You don’t need their applause. What you need is to break free from their opinions and live boldly, unapologetically, in the truth of who you are.

Their praise won’t save you. Their criticism can’t hurt you. None of it defines your worth. The only thing that matters is how you see yourself when the noise quiets down, and all that’s left is your own truth.

If you are looking for support in digging your way out from under the expectations of everyone around you, hit me up.

I want to chat about the things you obsess over when you lie awake at night. I want to unpack your dreams and your nightmares. I want to talk about who you were before all that shit dimmed your shine and how to get her back. 

I’m not here to fix you because I don't think you're broken—I’m here to help you fall in love with yourself and your life again. No mood shaming, no gaslighting, just real, transformative coaching from someone with three decades of experience. Ready to reclaim your fire? Let’s set some sparks flying. DM me.

You can also find me at www.thecoachngguild.com if you’re interested in coach training.