Angela doesn’t think she and her husband are going to be able to save their failing marriage. He has had not one, but two affairs. It seems obvious counseling after the first affair didn’t take, so the second time she didn’t even suggest it. She’s miserable, but she’s still there. Angela admits she can’t see herself staying for another holiday season or anniversary, but she also doesn’t actually see a way to make the break. They barely speak. They do not touch. Angela is half in, half out and it’s hellish.
Teresa always dreamed of teaching dance. It’s all she can ever remember wanting to do. When she started her dance studio and kept her day job she told herself it would only be six months before she quit working for the DMV. It’s been three years. The dance studio is losing money. The DMV is making her insane. She has a knee injury. It’s such a disappointment, but she can’t make herself quit, either of them. Teresa is half in, half out and it’s hellish.
Alex has always known his destiny. From the time he was little he knew he’d play professional ball. His parents invested their life fortune, which wasn’t much, in coaches and clinics. Alex has amazing natural talent and incredible learned skill. However, college ball wasn’t what he’d hoped. He doesn’t have the fire for it anymore. Alex doesn’t know if he wants to play pro anymore. He still goes to practice because his scholarship depends on it, but he’s quit going to lift weights or work with his trainer. He feels like a failure even thinking about opting out. Alex is half in, half out and it’s hellish.
We’re taught when we’re children that winners never quit and quitters never win. However, there is a fate far worse than quitting. That fate is half in, half out. Half in, half out is territory where souls die and dreams are lost. The courage to quit is just as important as the commitment to press on for our happiness. Moreover, the courage to quit can also be a critical ingredient in success. Half in, half out is the worst kind of purgatory.
You can let go and be free to start anew. You can call it quits and walk away to play another day or never again.
If you’re only half in, either get in or get out. That simple.
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Lisa Hayes, The Love Whisperer, is an LOA Relationship Coach. She helps clients leverage Law of Attraction to get the relationships they dream about and build the lives they want. Lisa is the author of the newly released hit book, Score Your Soulmate and How to Escape from Relationship Hell and The Passion Plan.